Random Kindness Amid Scandals

By now we’ve shifted from the stories of misery at the voting polls and Hurricane Sandy to the juicy Washington sex scandal. I will admit to being mesmerized by the bizarre details that come to light daily that have apparently caused the downfall of General Petraeus.

Meanwhile, very little airtime is being given to the sex scandal of a Brig. General in Ft. Bragg who is accused of sexual misconduct with the women under his command. I can’t help but wonder why this has seen so little news coverage. I could find nothing on the internet past 11/6, but hear little blurbs now and then on NPR news.

But back to the voting polls. When I arrived at 3:30 PM on voting day, there were hundreds of people in line facing a 3+ hour wait.

It so happened I was reading Rod Stewart’s biography, so that kept me entertained until the sun went down. Darn, and I was just at the point where Rod and Jeff Beck were parting company and Rod was going out on his own. Then there was just standing….moving five feet at a time ever half hour or so.

We privileged Americans don’t often relish standing in lines, and will usually just leave, but I was heartened to see at least 100 people behind me as I neared the entrance to the place where I would mark my ballot.

The main reason I am writing about this old news is that about 45 minutes before it was my turn, suddenly a woman appeared with stacks of pepperoni pizzas. She was a worker, but said she didn’t know who had purchased them. She just said a lady showed up with all the pizzas and asked that they be given out to those of us in line. There was plenty for everybody. I’m here to tell you that that piece of pizza was one of the best I have ever tasted. The mood in the crowd was lifted immeasurably by this random act of kindness.

Whoever you are, I would like to thank you for that marvelous respite for we voters who hadn’t thought to bring a bag lunch. (Some had the foresight to bring a chair – not me).

After the sun went down and the line was moving glacially slow, the only thing that kept me there was the memory of a TV movie called “Iron Jawed Angels” about the suffragettes who fought for the right of women to vote so many decades ago. They suffered unspeakable indignities so that we could move along a line with our neighbors and be a part of what color our state would end up.
Now, back to the sex scandals. You boomers and above who are reading this will probably remember the first one that dominated our newspapers and airwaves. In 1974, Wilbur Mills, (D-Ark.) the powerful head of the House Ways and Means Committee saw his power eroded when, according to the New York Times, he was involved in an  incident in which a striptease dancer who performed under the stage name Fanne Foxe, the Argentine Firecracker, jumped out of his car and waded into the Tidal Basin beside the Jefferson Memorial.
Mr. Mills blamed his struggle with alcoholism for the incident. Foxe later changed her stage name to “The Tidal Basin Bombshell.”
Two years later, Wayne Hays, (D-Ohio) was involved in a very juicy sex scandal with a woman named Elizabeth Ray. The Washington Post broke the story quoting Elizabeth Ray, Hays's former secretary, saying that Hays hired her on his staff, and later gave her a raise as staff of the House Administration Committee for two years to serve as his mistress. Ostensibly a secretary, Ray admitted: "I can't type. I can't file. I can't even answer the phone." She even "let a reporter listen in as the Ohio congressman told her on the phone that his recent marriage (to another former secretary) would not affect their arrangement."
So, all this scandal is nothing we boomers haven’t grown up around. When this current dust settles, we’ll go back to our regular concerns about paying the mortgage and health insurance premiums. But, mixed among all our concerns, I’m confident there will be random acts of kindness to remind us of the good that is the American way.

Stop saying basically!

An amazing thing happened to me this week. I was having a conversation 
with my friend Jim when he told me that he had just purchased an 
Oriental rug. After telling me what its dimensions were and where he 
planned to place it, I had to ask about the colors.

“It’s basically black, with a few pink and gold rosettes and a few pink 
and gold borders,” was his answer. I was dumbfounded. It was the first 
time in many years that I had actually heard a person use the word 
basically in a meaningful context. I could picture the rug. It made 
sense. I cared about the decoration of his den.

This may seem a small thing to you, but I have been keeping track of 
how misused the word basically has become in our lexicon for a long, 
long time. I have no idea where it started, but I think people insert 
it into sentences to sound more intelligent, or perhaps the way we 
would use, “you know,” “um,” and “and uh.” Let’s face it, it’s a filler 
and nothing more in the way it is currently used.

I have been riveted to the coverage of Hurricane Sandy, constantly 
thanking my stars that somehow it missed us, while grieving for those 
who like us have borne the ravages of fall weather fury. In the dark 
hours before the worst hit, I was watching CNN and listening to NPR as 
I went about getting ready for work. A reporter in East Manhattan 
pointed behind her and said, “Well, the power is out here, and 
everything is basically black.” I looked behind her, and everything was 
truly black. Why did she need the word basically? Moments later on NPR, 
a reporter on the same scene, described this part of Manhattan as 
basically black. “Not a light in sight.” he marveled.

The next morning a lady who had walked down 15 flights of stairs to let 
her dog out and plug her cell phone in at the CNN mobile unit told a 
reporter, “It’s basically been a nightmare.”

Each hour as I watch the coverage and see more deaths and destruction, 
I sometimes feel tears welling, remembering Charley and even Andrew. I 
don’t meant o make light of any of this despair. I would just like to 
point out that whenever someone is interviewed or somehow in front of a 
microphone, basically just creeps out there, and I have no idea why.

I’ve revealed here before that one of my guilty pleasures is watching 
Judge Judy every afternoon at 5 PM. I just marvel at how people really 
think that she will believe that someone gifted them money with no 
expectation of repayment. Judy cuts right to the chase and gets them to 
tell her word for word how the money exchange happened. Inevitably, the 
defendant will use the word “borrow”, and the case will be over. But 
not before they try to whittle it down to “basically, what happened 
was….” Judy will erupt with “NOT BASICALLY!!!, I want to hear word for 
word what the exchange was.” I sit there alone in my living room 
applauding. (Give me a break here, last week’s column was about my 
addiction to public broadcasting.)

No column on this subject would be complete without mentioning 
professional athletes. Just notice, the next time you’re watching an 
interview with some poor sportscaster who has to interview the 
quarterback of a losing team. “What do you think went wrong out there 
today Bubba?” she asks. “Well, basically we just lost our momentum; 
didn’t accomplish what we set out to do tonight.” Would someone please 
tell these athletes that inserting basically doesn’t make them sound 
more intelligent or informed? My significant other has 3 televisions on 
during these exchanges and I can’t escape it, or I wouldn’t be 
complaining so fervently here, I promise you.

Alright, that’s it for now for my complaining, except for a few things 
that wouldn’t make an entire column:

•Could mothers please think of a few new names other than Emma, 
Kathryn, Kathleen and Caitlain for their babies: I am so sick of Katies 
of all ages everywhere, and the Emmas will soon be invading middle 
schools. Keep in mind that in my generation, it was Cathy and Kathy 
with some Debbies thrown in.

•Would people please stop honking at me to make a right turn on a red 
arrow? We can only do this when it is blinking. I know this from 
numerous trips to traffic school.

•It started with “Pardon the Interruption, and “The View”, but now, 
every station has panels of 5 or more people discussing a topic – ALL 
TALKING AT ONCE. I used to love these shows, but now everyone must 
insert a witty comment whether it’s needed or not.

DISCLAIMER: I know I have been incessantly complaining in the above, so 
if there is something you would like to complain about , please e-mail 
me, or comment at my blog at bellingonboomers.com.

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